Centre of Attention

no2.

Hi Again,

Thanks for returning to my blog, I am sorry it has been a while since I last uploaded a post; life has thrown a couple of curve balls that I am currently dealing with. However, it is nice to know you feel you can stop by even if the circumstances in your life are not what you want. Or maybe you are feeling uncomfortable in a current relationship and you want to make sense of his/her behaviour.  Maybe you are a business that supports individuals who are; or they have thankfully survived or escaped an abusive intimate relationship. Maybe you are a mother, father, sibling, aunt, uncle or a friend of someone who has experienced or currently in a difficult relationship, and you wish to gain a deeper understanding of the dynamics of a troubled relationship. In my first post, I was candid enough to share with you; why I started this blog and what event made me decide it was the time to step into the unknown of the world wide web to publish my experience/s. (I also mentioned I am dyslexic so please excuse my grammar from time to time).

In this publication, I would like to show you how an abusive relationship
develops.  When you meet ‘the person of your dreams’ you are made to feel special, he/she calls you often, and they want you exclusively to themselves. They make you feel they are giving you all the attention you rightly deserve.  Whilst this ‘love bombing’ is happening, you see ‘Red Flag’ behaviour’s: – for example he/she says or does something totally unacceptable and you feel upset/angry or even surprised. However, in the back of your mind, you hope that what you see and feel are just fleeting minor irritations or perhaps you feel that you are being childish (self-blame), and you shake it off and ignore it.  So you continue with the relationship because the effect of the ‘love bombing’ makes you feel charmed and loved up. This is only because your ‘special one’ has a plot in mind….

In my next publication I will go deeper into the plotting patterns and
behaviour of the ‘person of your dreams’ and how this affects the receiving partner (YOU) or the person you are concerned about.  I will also be giving you tools and tips how to combat/overcome such a divisive manipulative person.

In the meanwhile, please don’t keep this website a secret, there are many
people suffering in silence in their relationships, and my aim is to help as many
people as I can. Therefore, please, like share this link with friends and
family and let’s expose the ‘abusers’ for who they really are! I can’t wait to see you
back again and for a follow -up on ‘Centre of Attention’  where I can give some examples why  ‘Red Flags’ and  ‘love bombing’ is used. until then take care.

My First Hello!

Hello there!

Welcome to my first blog, after yesterday’s verdict of lowering a conviction charge from murder to manslaughter as in the case of Sally Challen, I felt compelled to make a start on this blog as I can identify with her story. I have fought with this for over a year, because I was afraid to tell the world my story. However, for some reason I kept getting signs to write, speak my truth and be honest with you. I am unsure whether to speak about my experience of dyslexia and how it has been pervasive in every sphere of my life, which affected my mental health and self-esteem. Or whether I should speak about my experience of being in an abusive relationship and how I feel the two may be connected, which benefitted my ex in his quest to manipulate and control my life.

In the following months I will be posting my experiences because my aim is to support you, giving you tips or markers that might help you.